Explain to me how this happens.

I randomly got my CPA exam score today for the last section I took on Jan 16. I wasn't expecting it until next month, so imagine my shock and horror when I saw a huge, glaring "70" staring at me instead of the usual "Error: Score not found...blah blah blah" that I was used to seeing. Just to recap for those of you who haven't heard me stress out over this, you need a 75 to pass, so this was not quite up to par...and add to the fact that I got a 71 on the last section I took, I was not in the best of moods today. In fact, this really explained the jumpy, nervous, overall horribly bad feeling I had all morning...at least that feeling went away as soon as I saw that disaster.

So I'm flarking pissed. I studied way harder for this section and got a worse score...funny how that works. I'm retaking the first failed section on April 3 and I guess I'll be trying to reschedule this one for the end of May now and move one new section to July (the other new section will hopefully be in August/September). At least I forced myself to run this evening and it was awesome...weather had to have been around 60 and I went out in shorts and long sleeves. Granted, that good mood ended as soon as I got back in the car and had time to think about it, but still...it was good while it lasted.

Hooray!

Ok, so it's been a really long time since I've had anything to say besides some pissing and moaning (which I'm really good at)...but I decided that rather than sit here and moan and groan, I'd just avoid the whole thing until I had something good to say. Well, I can finally report back.

After weeks of physical therapy, two orthopedic surgeons who have no clue what they're doing (again, if you have nothing nice to say...) an MRI and gaining who knows how many pounds (I took the battery out of the scale because the hubs needed one for his car clicker thing...seriously, a car clicker thing is so much better than seeing the proof of my weight gain) I have *FINALLY* been cleared to run again! It turns out that this whole pesky knee issue wasn't entirely a knee issue to begin with. Granted, the MRI did show some thickening of the plica, but it also showed that I had a very, very low level sprain in two hamstrings, which was most likely the cause of my pain. I didn't find that that out from my ortho (his answer was "No! You don't need surgery!" followed by "Run again...wait, NEVER run again...wait, run whenever you feel like it." and further followed by "Well, if you still have pain, we can always do surgery."). I guess I suck at this keeping my not-so-nice thoughts to myself thing, huh? Oh well, I'm still frusterated that I spent $40 and almost 2 hours to get no answers from him when my PT took 3 minutes to look over the MRI report and told me everything I needed to know. She rocks.

So I went out for my first run yesterday doing intervals of 2 min running and 2 min walking for a grand total of 28 mins (ok, it was probably closer to 30 mins because I wound up doing a little extra running at the end with out my watch on...hey, I had to get back to the parking lot somehow...) I went a whopping 2 miles, which I won't complain about...I won't even cry about how I should have done something like 14 miles in preparation for Seattle this summer (which I'm dropping out of). It was awesome...it was amazing! I'm sore as all heck and my legs are screaming at me in disbelief that I would make them do this horrible thing again...but I'm so super happy.

And to celebrate my return, today I entered the lottery for the NYC Marathon which will be held on November 1. I am entrant number 341582. :)

It feels like 5 years

but I can (semi) run again! The ortho kinda cleared me yesterday and I'll be talking about it with my physical therapist on Friday. If things go the way I expect, I'll be back out on Saturday!

I have more to say, but it's almost 11 and I'm exhausted...tomorrow.

MRI on Wednesday

and it's been six weeks today since I've run. Since I have nothing good to say, I'll leave it at that. I should be in bed anyway...it's almost 11 and I have PT at 7 tomorrow morning.

4 weeks...

That's how long it's been since I've run. Four long, long weeks. Seattle is starting to look like it may not happen...or if it does happen, it'll be only as a half. I originally thought I'd be back after a couple of weeks off and if I could be going again by the beginning of February, I'd definitely be doing the full, but I'd be surprised if I can even get the MRI scheduled by then. So we'll see...Speaking of which...

I had my 2nd opinion this past Wednesday and I really liked this doctor A LOT! He examined me and said it seems like I have plica. I'm on anti-inflammatories for a couple of weeks and will be doing physical therapy to try and help that. Basically, it's not life threatening or anything (and by non life threatening I mean I'll be able to run again...someday) it's just painful and in the doc's words "it just makes you lose interest" because of the pain. If it doesn't go away, it can ruin my joint though, and that's kinda scary...and that will involve some type of injections (see two posts ago), but we caught it early enough and with my age, we should avoid that. He also said the he didn't think I have a meniscus tear, but considering I was told that I did (and as we all know by now, meniscus tears don't heal on their own) he has ordered an MRI. It has to get insurance approval first, so that could take up to a week to get, then who knows how long to actually schedule. His orders were definiately no running until after the MRI, but I can do anykind of low-impact cross training so long as it doesn't bother me.

I'm trying to formulate a plan though because this sitting around and doing things as they come thing is not working out for me. I'm really one of those people that has to keep going, otherwise watching TV or sleeping will become a priority. So far I haven't had much time to do either one of those activities, thanks to my lack of CPA exam passing abilities, but I'm afraid I'm going to have a really rough time when I can get started again. So I'm going to go lift weights Monday, Wednesday and Fridays (just upper body since my knee won't cooperate) and I'm going to swim on Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. I really want to bike, but it's been painful...I may try again next Saturday though, just to see. Our Jamaica trip is coming up so fast (exactly 3 months from today!) and I hate being like this, but I really want to look a little bit better in a swim suit. I feel ridiculous saying that because that is NOT the reason I even started working out, but there it is.

Our beginners group, In Motion, also starts in a couple of weeks. Both of my younger sisters have joined and I'm super excited about that. I'm hoping to be able to get out and do something - anything - with the In Motion group since they'll be there, so cross your fingers.

And I know I've been whiney lately and I've done nothing but complain...I know it's annoying. But at least by getting it out here, it's out and I'm not dumping it on everyone 24/7 the way I normally would (well, not as often anyway).

It continues

After talking to a few people (physical therapists and nurses included) I've decided to skip out on the injections. Coupled with the fact that the orthopedics' office wouldn't "allow" me to talk to my doctor - or anyone, for that matter - I'm going for a second opinion with a new doctor on Wednesday. This whole thing has made the pain in my knee travel up into my head. :( Even after the cortisone injection 10 days ago, I'm in pain and my knee now feels like it's going to give out on me. That has me worried.

In totally unrelated news, I sat for another section of the CPA exam on Friday and it was about as fun as dealing with all these knee issues. I should have results for that section in March sometime. I also sit for the section I failed on February 27 and a whole new section on April 20...5 days before we leave for Jamaica, unless I need surgery, in which case I may need to postpone the trip...news that the hubs doesn't quite believe yet. I don't want to plan for or against surgery, but it would really suck to have it come out of the blue and then to have my vacation ripped away...but our vacation policy changed at work and unless we can save up some serious amounts of money (kinda hard when you fail an exam that costs $250 to retake EACH SECTION plus whatever the insurance company won't cover for the actual surgery) I'm not sure I can afford vacation for fun and then vacation for misery.

Ugh, tell me it gets better.

I'm out for a little bit

Not that that's news or anything...or not that I haven't already been out for a while (2 weeks as of today). I'm just really flipping bummed and getting a little pissed off and doing the whole "why me?" thing. Needless to say, I had my appointment with the orthopedic surgeon on Friday.

It wasn't all bad, but it wasn't all good either. First and foremost, he said that I'm wearing down the cartilage in my left knee (the one causing the end of all happiness in my life)...according to him, this isn't too hard to take care of, but it needs to be taken care of ASAP in order to find out what is going on with my meniscus. So, in order to do this, he suggests a cortisone injection right then and there and then a series of three other injections in which they'll put this "gel" substance into my cartilage (I think...I need to do more research and find a better way to say this...I will not have some kind of cool, bionic knee after this). The sucky part about these other injections (besides the pain, and if you know me, you know that I hyperventilate, cry, puke and do all kinds of other fun things at the mere idea of injections) is that they need to be done once a week, at the same time ever week...and he only offers them between the hours of 9-11 AM, Monday through Friday. Yep, that works out just lovely with my crazy, out of town work schedule...but luckily I work for an awesome firm and they're working me around my stupid injections. I won't be allowed to do anything strenuous after the injections and - ::gasp:: - no high heels for at least the day of the injections, but I think I can survive that. It'll be rough, but I'll do my best (I am also the girl who showed up for the appt w/the ortho wearing 4 inch knee high boots.....keep that in mind).

Sooo...back to my scary problem. If these injections work out, I'll be able to start running again soon. If I can do it pain-free, I'm good. If I have pian, it's almost definitely related to my meniscus. About 10 years ago I was in high school cheerleading - shocking, I know - and I was doing this cool little stunt called a bow and arrow (Note: This is not me, this is some random girl I found thanks to Google Image Search...also, I am afraid of heights and did not trust the other girls to hold me up, so my cool little stunt was performed on the ground, where I *thought* I'd be safe). Anyway, I finally got my leg up to places that normal physical anatomy would not allow it, and the leg I was standing on suddenly gave out and I wound up in a heap on the floor...I couldn't really figure out what happened and it took me a little while to realize that my knee cap was currently sitting on the outside of my leg. I wound up with a nasty dislocated patella and a torn meniscus...but the ortho I saw at that time said I didn't need surgery, but he wouldn't be surprised if I would need it by the time I was 25...well, I'll be 26 in April.

So this new ortho that I'm seeing said that meniscus tears never heal on their own...but at the same time, you don't actually need to fix them if they don't bother you. Considering that for the past several years my only exercise consisted of moving from the couch to the fridge, it didn't bother me...but now that I do slightly more than that, there's a chance it's bothering me. He said that the fact that swimming last Tuesday night and the way he was moving me around hurt my knee, he'd be surprised if I'm not having some meniscus problems...but until I have this cartilage problem under control, there's no way to know for sure where my pain is coming from. So once I get that fixed, if I still have pain, I go in for an MRI to see where and how bad the tear is, then we discuss the surgery options...and I say goodbye to Seattle and probably to any other full marathon I was hoping to do this year too. The hubs is taking me to Jamacia in April, so any surgery would have to wait till after that. :(

So, sorry for the novel, but there it is...the bane of my existance.